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S14E01: Don't Let a Cheese Hit Me

Eleven new teams take off on a race around the world for one-million dollars in the premiere of the fourteenth season of The Amazing Race.

Genres:

Air Date:

Feb 15, 2009

Runtime:

42 minutes

Production:

Worldrace Productions , Neue Vitaskop Film , ABC Studios , Jerry Bruckheimer Television

Casts:

Phil Keoghan

The Amazing Race

The Race Begins

Divide and Conquer

Colossal Showdown

Whatever it Takes to Win

Triumph and Loss

Competition to the Fullest

The Unexpected Twist

To the Physical and Mental Limit

Fight to the Last Minute

Race to the Finish (1)

Race to the Finish (2)

The World is Waiting: Go!

Help Me, I'm American

My Alarm Clock Didn't Go Off

This Game Is About Minutes

Welcome to the World of Being Human

I'm Gonna Take His Girl

I'm Gonna Throw Up on Phil's Shoes

I'm Not a Miner! No, You're an Idiot!

Ready to Lose Our Lives

It's Hammer Time

Follow That Plane!

What If Our Parachute Doesn't Open?

This Seems Like The Path Straight to Hell!

You Always Just Forget About Me!

Did You See How I Stopped It? With My Face

What Happens If I Slip? Am I Just Hanging Off a Cliff?

I'm a Much Better Liar Than You Are

I'm Supposed to be Indebted to Her for the Rest of the Race?!

This Is More Important Than Your Pants Falling Down!

Why Did You Have to Take Your Pants Off?!

Don't Try to Play the Moralist Now!

They're Slithering to the Finish Line Like the Rest of Us!

Cheaters Never Win --- And They Cheated!

It Doesn't Say Anything About First Come, First Served. And We're Bigger.

I Wasn't Even Going to Touch You Until You Slammed My Head Backwards!

Check Your Tires Because...Oh God, You Never Know What'll Happen!

You Are Just Deliberately Trying to Make Us Lose!

I Could Never Have Been Prepared for What I'm Looking at Right Now

We're Going Down the Wrong Side of the Freeway... and the Lights Are Off!

The Princess Reminded Me of My Grandmother. She Was Very Old but Still Very, Very with It

We're Not at Charm School Learning How to Be a Gentleman, We're Racing

That's Me. That's My Face. Just Hit My Face. Hit My Face!

Such a Nice Pheremone Smell to You; Just Makes Me Want to Stay Close to You

He's a Few Ticks Away from Having a Heart Attack!

It's Like Adam Building His First House!

Clearly, I'm More Intelligent Than You

It Turned Ugly Just Now

I Got Electrocuted

Who Says Pageant Girls Don't Eat?

Are You Good at Puzzles?

Why Can't We Get a Camel?

Are You Sure This Is Safe?

I'm Going to Jail

If You're Gonna Whine, Just Shut Up!

If They're Screwing the Helmet to My Head, It Can't Be Good

It's Okay, Run Them Over!

You've Just Made Me a Millionaire

The Game's Afoot

I'm Not His Wife -- He Doesn't Need to Scream at Me

Counting Bears Is Not Rocket Science

What if It Isn't Sanitary

Quit Following Us

They Should Probably Have Some Counseling

Phil Is a Choo-Choo Charlie

One of You, I'm Gonna Break in Half

Tell My Mom I Love Her

Are There Instructions on Donkey Handling?

It Always Comes Down to the Details

You Deal With This Before I Hyperventilate

4 Continents, 24 Cities, 40,000 Miles

Courteous? This Is a Race!

The Whole Country Hates Me

Do You Need Some Mouth-to-Mouth Resuscitation

What a Gaucho You Are

I've Been Wanting a Face-Lift for a Long Time

Houston, We Have An Elephant

They Saved the Eyeball

Mow'em Down Like Grass

We Have A Bad Elephant!

We Got a Gnome! We Got a Gnome!

The Devil Made Me Do It

Five Continents, 25 Cities and More than 40,000 Miles

Go Mommy, Go! We Can Beat Them

How Do We Know We Aren't Going to Get Shot?

I Don't Kiss, I Make Out!

Think Like an Office Chair

We're Getting Out of the Country, Girls

I'm Sick of Doing Stuff I Can't Do

I Don't Roll with the Punches, I Punch / You Look Ridiculous

How's That Face Feel?

Don't Talk To Me Like I Was An Animal Or Something

The Family Christmas Card

25 Days, 50 Cities and More than 600 Consecutive Hours as a Family

Here We Go, Baby, Off to Win a Million Bucks!

I'm Filthy and I Love It!

I'm in Russia Playing with Dolls

It's Not Over Until Phil Sings

Good Thing I Took That Human Anatomy Class in High School

Sleep Deprivation Is Really Starting to Irritate Me

Herculean Effort for Some Herculean Dudes

Here Comes the Bedouin!

Do you Know how much Running I Did today, Phil?

Man, They Should Have Used Their Fake Names

I Think This Monkey Likes Me!

5 Continents... 10 Countries... and More Than 59 Thousand Miles!

Real Fast! Quack, Quack!

Can Horses Smell Fear?

Oh Wow, It's like One of Those Things You See on TV!

I Know Phil, Little Ol' Gorgeous Thing!

I Covered His Mouth, Oh My Gosh!

Maybe Steven Seagal Will See Me And Want Me to Be in One of His Movies!

I Wonder If This Is Going to Make My Fingers Pickle

He Can't Swim, But He Can Eat Cow Lips!

Being Polite Sucks Sometimes

Lookin' Like A Blue-Haired Lady On A Sunday Drive

We Just Won't Die, Like Roaches

Dude, I'm Such a Hot Giant Chick Right Now!

Say Your Deepest Prayers Ever

I Told You Less Martinis and More Cardio

Beauty Is Sometimes Skin Deep

I'm Sorry I'm Wearing a Bathing Suit. It Is Very Weird, I Know

No Babies on the Race!

You Need To Watch Your Jokes, Guy

We're Going to Trade You for Food Now

If I Were In Town, I Would Ask For Your Number (1)

If I Were In Town, I Would Ask For Your Number (2)

The Way You Look, Yeah

We Are Trying to Make Love, Not War

Good Doing Business With You

Oh My God, the Teletubbies Go to War

Low to the Ground, That's My Technique

Donkeys Have Souls, Too

I’ve Become the Archie Bunker of the Home

Please, Lord, Give Me Milk!

Let's Name Our Chicken Phil

We've Really Burned Bridges, For Sure

Cherry on Top of the Sundae that's Already Melted

This is Forever, Now

Honestly, They Have Witch Powers or Something!

I Just Hope He Doesn't Croak On Us

Sorry, Guys, 'I'm Not Happy to See You'

Bees are Much Calmer than All This!

Do You Like American Candy?

Did You Push My Sports Bra Off the Ledge?

I Wonder If They Like Blondes in New Zealand?

Do It Like a Madman

Please Hold While I Singe My Skull

My Nose Is on Fire

I’m Like an Angry Cow

You're Gonna Get Me Killed

You Look Like Peter Pan

Don't Let a Cheese Hit Me

Your Target Is Your Partner's Face

I'm Not Wearing That Girl's Leotard!

It Was Like a Caravan of Idiots

She's a Little Scared of Stick, But I Think She'll Be OK!

Alright Guys, We're at War!

Gorilla? Gorilla? Gorilla?

Rooting Around in People's Mouths Could Be Unpleasant

Our Parents Will Cry Themselves to Death

Having a Baby's Gotta Be Easier Than This

He Made Me Look Like Alice Cooper

This Is How You Lose a Million Dollars

They Thought Godzilla Was Walking Down the Street

It's Like Being Dropped on Planet Mars

Sean Penn Cambodia Here We Come

I'm Like Ricky Bobby

Do It for the Hood! Do It for the Suburbs!

This is Not My Finest Hour

This is the Worst Thing I've Ever Done in My Life

We’re Not Meant for the Swamp

We're Not Working With Anybody, Ever, Anymore!

It Starts With an “F”, That’s All I’m Saying

Amazing Grace, How Sweet the Sound!

Nanna is Kickin' Your Butt

When the Cow Kicked Me in the Head

Run Like Scalded Dogs!

We Are No Longer in the Bible Belt

I Think We're Fighting the Germans, Right?

You're Like Jason Bourne, Right?

I Feel Like I'm in, Like, Sicily

They Don't Even Understand Their Own Language

Huger Than Huge

They Don't Call It the Amazing Race for Nothin'!

A Kiss Saves the Day

In Phil We Trust

We Should Have Brought Gloves and Butt Pads

Tastes Like a Million Dollars

Run, Babushka, Run

I Want to Be in the Circus, That's Where I Belong

Ali Baba in a Suit

There's a Lot of Nuts and Bullets

I Hate Chinese Food

I'm Surrounded by Ninjas

Hi. I'm Sorry. I'm in a Race.

Head Down and Hold On

I Never Looked So Foolish In My Whole Entire Life

We Had a Lot of Evil Spirits Apparently

This Is The Most Stupid Day Ever

Don't Ruin the Basketball Game

I Feel Like a Monkey In a Circus Parade

You Don't Get Paid Unless You Win

I Cannot Deal With Your Psycho Behavior

We're Good American People

Too Many Cooks In the Kitchen

This Is Where It Ends (1)

This is Where It Ends (2)

Kindness of Strangers

The Sprint of Our Life

Don't Lay Down On Me Now

This Is Gonna Be a Fine Mess

I Feel Like I'm In the Circus

We Love Your Country Already - It Is Very Spacious

It's Speedo Time

Release the Brake!

We Are Charlie Chaplin

Go Out and Get It Done

Tears of a Clown

You Know I'm Not as Smart as You

Bust Me Right in the Head with It

Taste Your Salami

Uglier Than a Mud Rail Fence

This is Wicked Strange

I Didn't Make Her Cry

Let Them Drink Their Haterade

Bollywood Travolta

I Need Hair to Be Pretty

It's a Great Place to Become Millionaires (1)

It's a Great Place to Become Millionaires (2)

Double Your Money

Long Hair, Don't Care

There's No Crying in Baseball

Chill Out, Freak

Get Your Sexy On

Off to See the Wizard

Not a Well-Rounded Athlete

Take Down That Million

Business in the Front, Party in the Back

Loose Lips Sink Ships

Like James Bond Again

I Love Monkeys!

Your Tan is Totally Cool

Scorpion King Hunter

Be Safe and Don't Hit a Cow

My Cheese is Out of Control

The Ultimate Fun House

Working Our Barrels Off

We're Not In Oklahoma No More

King Arthur Style

Beards in the Wind

Get Our Groove On

Choir Boy at Heart

Speed Dating Is the Worst

Part Like the Red Sea

Cobra in My Teeth

Amazing "Crazy" Race (1)

Amazing "Crazy" Race (2)

Back in the Saddle

Baby Bear's Soup

Welcome to the Jungle

Smarter, Not Harder

Can't Make Fish Bite

The Gladiators Are Here!

Accidental Alliance

Hei Ho Heidi Ho

Do You Believe in Magic?

Go Big or Go Home

When You Gotta Go, You Gotta Go

Get Your Sheep Together

Thinly Sliced Anchovies

Morocc' and Roll

I Feel Like I Just Kissed a Goat

Pretty Fly for a Food Scientist

Hot Sexy Knights

You're Taking My Tan Off

Smells Like Dirty Tube Socks

Great Way to Start a Relationship

I Got the Smartest Dude

The Great Amazing Nasty Race

Get In That Lederhosen, Baby

Smells Like a Million Bucks

Back in Business

Moment of Truth

Can I Get a Hot Tub!

Fruits of Our Labor

In It to Win It

Monster Truck Heroes

A Little Too Much Beefcake

Get In There And Think Like A Dog

Where My Dogs At?

Good Old Fashioned Spit in the Face

King of the Jungle

My Tongue Doesn't Even Twist That Way

Full Speed Ahead, Captain!

Krakow, I'm Gonna Get You

It's Always the Quiet Ones

Bring the Fun, Baby!

It's Not Easy Beating Green

We Got a Chance, Baby!

I Should've Been a Boy Scout

You Look Like Gollum

Bros Being Jocks

Get It Trending

We're Only Doing Freaky Stuff Today

Let the Good Times Roll

Welcome to Bloody Fingers 101

I Have a Wedgie and a Half

Salt That Sand!

That's Money, Honey

The Only First That Matters

We're Coming for You, Phil!

Scared Spitless

Bucket List Type Stuff

Another One Bites the Dust

Have Faith in Me, Broski

Double U-Turn Ahead

Have Fun and Get It Done

Good Job, Donkey

I Thought We Were Playing It Nice

Riding a Bike is Like Riding a Bike

As Easy as Stacking Cups

We're Going to Victory Lane

You're a Champion, Prove It

You're the Best French Fry Ever

It's Gonna be a Fragrant Day

Gotta Put Your Sole Into It (1)

Gotta Put Your Sole Into It (2)

The Claws Are Out

All's Fair in Love and War (1)

All's Fair in Love and War (2)

The First Rule of the Amazing Race Club (1)

The First Rule of the Amazing Race Club (2)

It's Just a Million Dollars, No Pressure (1)

It's Just a Million Dollars, No Pressure (2)

You're in Our Race Now

Knock the Newbie Out of Us

Here Fishy, Fishy, Fishy

I Took Out a Polar Bear

I'm a Bird, I'm a Plane, I'm on The Amazing Race!

Who Wants a Rolex?

Living Fearlessly

You're the Apple in My Eye

Chugga Chugga Choo Choo!

This One Is for One Million Dollars

One Million Miles

Red Lipstick Is Not My Color

We're Makin' Big Moves

You Don't Strike Me as a Renaissance Man

I'm Not Even Walking, I'm Falling

Give Me a Beard Bump

Are You a Rickshaw?

This Is Not Payback, This Is Karma

Getting Down to the Nitty Gritty

Run on Your Tippy Toes

Now It's About Winning

It Can't Be That Easy

Who Has This One in the Bag?

Ready to Restart the Race

Stairway to Hell

Gently Down the Stream

No Room for Error

In the Hands of the Amazing Race Gods

Many Firsts But Don't Be Last

Patience, Is the New Me

It's All in the Details

Everyone's an Artist

The Amazing Race of Arabia

It's Simply Medieval

Vamos a la Playa

Don't Look Down

How Am I Going to Survive This?

The Only Leg That Matters

The Amazing Race Is Back!

You Don't See That at Home

No Sleep and a Million Dollar Dream

The Day Keeps Rockin' Here in Vietnam

Yessir, the Pink City

Driving Head-On Into Scooters

Like Two Cats Fighting in a Car

A Planes, Trains and Automobiles Day

In the Belly of the Earth

Everyone Loves a Comeback Story

We're Finding Our Pot of Gold

A Sunset, Seattle Scramble

You Can't Drive While You're Crying

Trust But Verify

It's Not Over Til Phil Sings

Those Who Wander Are Not Lost

Save the Stress for Later

Our Alliance Strikes Again

Walk and Chew Gum Baby

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